On Monday I fumbled my phone giving it extra velocity and I heard *thud* on hardwood. The screen was fine and there was no exterior damage. Phew. Unfortunately it wouldn’t boot. I called a phone repair and they said it sounded like a part of the motherboard broke. “You’re fucked.” Naturally I had cancelled my insurance the month before as I was on payment 19 of 32 and they were still collecting $14 a month. Not having a phone was liberating and extremely irritating at the same time for a 2 day stint. Here’s what I learned:

• Authenticators – I’m not sure how many of you use Authenticators but it’s becoming a necessity. My Coinbase PW was hacked (a different story) and I saved the account fortunately and went through the entire recovery process which ended with an Authticator being installed on my phone. This was the same for Outlook. Great in theory except for when your phone is dismantled and doesn’t boot, you can’t access your email or Coinbase account. Annoying to say the least to rely on a working phone as your crutch to prove your identity.

• Missing Texts – When you have no phone, you don’t get text messages. In theory this sounds liberating but what if there were an emergency and someone desperately needed to reach you? My parent fell down the steps? I’ll see you when I get my phone fixed in 3 days. Hope you hang on. Plus anyone who texts you and you don’t respond for 3 days also thinks you’re a jerk.

• Facebook – I would be lying if I said I didn’t use the apps provided by Facebook, specifically Instagram and WhatsApp. Those are owned by Facebook. There are also apps that you log into with Facebook that becomes more apparent when you start re-logging into your apps such as Spotify. Facebook is a giant data hack that sells you shit and don’t think of it as any other service. It spies on you and tracks your moves to provide you entertainment. It’s an evil company. Well just delete it? I swear it has its hands in it all that makes it easier to say than do.

• Trade in Value – My phone was 14 months old. I went to Gazelle to see how much it was worth and the first question is does it turn on. Mine doesn’t. Value = $12. Verizon also won’t take it back for the same reason. I’m going to go through the process of seeing if I can get the phone to turn back on for the hell of it. I had a case on my phone when it broke from a short distance. These phones are fragile and the business of repair is huge. I would never purchase a used phone either because I’ve had problems in the past. This was another reason I cancelled the insurance because they give you a refurbished phone. Another scam.

• Out of Stock – As a business owner, I need to have some way of communication to go along with my other needs such as email to my phone. It was a top priority of getting a phone quickly. I called Verizon and asked if they had a similar phone to mine and they did…in pink. The next black phone they had in stock was $200 more. Great. Hit me in the dick one more time.

I share this because it’s a pain in the ass and we’re becoming more reliant on our phones with each passing day. It’s becoming your ID. I personally find this horrifying to rely on a phone as being more essential than an appendage. This is the case though as each “extra security” step I have to add is using these authenticators. The phone is a tracking device that follows you around, listens to you, and can sabotage you with hacks that expose personal info. Be warned.