I have not posted in almost three weeks. A big reason for that is that I’ve been moving all my shit into an apartment with my GIRLFRIEND. In fact, I’m writing this post from our new apartment.
I’ve never lived with a girl. That’s not true. I lived with my mom and sister when I was growing up. But never since I was a teenager.
So I need tips for living with a girl. Meghan has seen my apartment and knows how I live, but she hasn’t seen me live. And I need to make sure I live the right way.
Here’s what I have so far:
- Don’t sit on the couch after a run.
- Flush the toilet no matter what’s in it, even just water.
- No blowing your nose in the shower(?)
- No sleeping naked (??????)
- Use the dishwasher.
- Don’t yell at chess.
And that doesn’t even include the cats which are basically an extension of me.
But there has to be more. Save me some trouble. What mistake am I going to make that isn’t listed here?
I’ll hopefully get back to posting regularly once the move is complete.
Anything you’ve enjoyed doing in your life, just stop doing it now. I don’t play any video games, I don’t drink during the week, I watch a lot of Bravo, I never leave things to do later such as clean or put something away.
Shape up or ship out.
Just get to the point where you can take a crap with her in the bathroom and it’s all gravy from there
This is a good time to retire peeing in the shower. Also, unless she asks for one, don’t buy her a vacuum for her birthday as a hint. TV sitcoms say that’s a bad idea. Lastly, give the blind cat some new digs / new people training (if he made the cut to the new apartment). Good luck!