Nary a Free Moment

Nary a Free Moment

My life has calmed down. I’ve gotten all the travel out of the way for September and I’m into an October of relaxation. Don’t invite me to your kid’s bday party, your wedding, your funeral, pumpkin carving, a haunted hay ride, or any bullshit...
A Shore Thing

A Shore Thing

The Stortz family is on a vacation for a week in Avalon, NJ. It’s the one time of year where we all get together to annoy the shit out of one another. There are a few kids running around – Jude, Josie, and baby Harrison – who spice up the day to day...
Suburban Steak Saga

Suburban Steak Saga

Suburban life has been predictably boring, so last night I treated myself to the pinnacle of excitement: a steak and potato dinner at Firebirds. I’d scoped it out before – wall-to-wall collared-shirt douchebags trying way too hard at the bar. This time, I...
Guess the Lyric

Guess the Lyric

She lies and says I don’t want to spoil it in the first line, but you probably know the lyric. Four plain words, sung a thousand times. It could be any song. Yet…I think you know it. The best lyrics are simple and somehow hold a whole life’s worth of...