Over the past 7 days I played 271 games of chess. That’s approximately 14 hours of chess. It can be a borderline addiction where I’m dreaming chess moves. You may say to yourself, “that’s potentially a problem.” Yet, if someone said they binge watched Season 1 of Game of Thrones over the weekend, you wouldn’t think twice. Is there a difference? One is a mentally simulating game and one is sitting on your ass watching TV. Can one be addicted to chess and not be addicted to watching television? Neither is particularly destructive to the human body, but there is a fine line to addiction.
Topic change, am I an alcoholic? Yes. I’m fully functional but a large amount of my “problems” stem from alcohol. Hungover and not feeling great. Lost a grand at the casino. Every single time I drive somewhere to have a beer. If you see me drinking and you say, “uh oh”, you’re not wrong. It’s my biggest weakness in life and it sounds simple to say, quit. The issue lies within an addictive personality that is created by a drive to succeed (in other habits not alcohol related). I hit my highest chess rating ever yesterday and it made me moderately proud, how can that be bad? However, if I told you that I drank for 14 hours straight, you’d 100% say there is a problem. If I play chess instead of drinking, I’m switching to a better addiction.
I include that paragraph to show how mindful you have to be in life. Every activity can be addictive. The bad ones inevitably will be bad. Drinking. Gambling. Phone time. Not surprisingly, the bad ones are always the most fun or else they wouldn’t be addicting. This post is asking are they still bad if they are controlled? I stopped betting for the last few weeks 1) because golf got stupid 2) I was losing 3 ) the money doesn’t matter. I’m not willing to risk an amount of money that would make me interested in the outcome. I don’t get excited winning $100 dollars. Counter intuitively, even if I won a big hit, I’d increase my betting amounts until I lost that amount. Since I know this, I’ve come to accept that when I’m betting any sports, it’s only for fun and never to make money.
What does that leave? Hard drugs are out. No nicotine. TV, movies, books are just way to pass time. I deleted Tik Tok. Losing money in the market is routine. Exercise is an easy constant for me. My job is a focal point of my life that is the most addictive of them all. How can making money be addictive? What if I said that I don’t even like doing it? If I don’t like doing it, then why do I keep doing it? It’s because of money. The idea that I can live my life financially secure by working hard is the driving force. Then what? There’s no answer other than be happy. How can you be happy when you’re forced to pick activities that are positive and stupid. Chase this golf ball around for 4 hours. Roll a ball into some pins. Meditate so you can feel as one with the world. Life is wasting time and that’s the sad reality because I’ve been wasting it for 38 years and people would look at me and say he’s achieved so much with a business.
The reason most people don’t think like this is because, it’s depressing. Many people need happy pills to get by, or are so busy with their family or job they don’t have time to think, or they don’t have the mental capacity to understand there is a huge world out there. I’ve traveled. I’ve partook in many of life’s fun activities. I’m aware pro-creation is a fundamental task for most humans. I understand that once you make money to do what you want, material objects hold little value. They can distract you, but they can’t provide fulfillment. I’m not finding God. We don’t have a lot of time on this Earth, we weren’t meant to spend it this way. Human beings were not meant to sit in little cubicles staring at computer screens all day filling out useless forms and listening to 8 different bosses drone on about missions statements.