CK4 will enjoy this post because he loves being mentioned in my stories.

Jeff and I were out at a jobsite early this morning running one of our machines. If you’ve spent any time around me over the past year, you’ve probably noticed I use the word machine a lot more than I used to. That’s because we’re actually selling machines now, and every contractor wants proof they work before writing a check. That means lots of demos and lots of video.

The alarm went off at 5:40 as usual. I skipped packing a lunch because we had no idea how long it would take to run 133 panels. Fortunately, the job went about as well as it could have. The machine never missed a beat. If we don’t sell a few of these bad boys after today’s footage, I’ll be surprised.

The downside was I didn’t eat again until 2:45.

By 3:20, CK4 and I were on the first tee with Rob and Bailey.

Rob was probably around 50 and hit the ball above average. At one point he mentioned he uses a yellow golf ball because his eyesight isn’t what it used to be.

Good information to know.

Bailey was about 25, covered in tattoos, and had only been golfing for two years. Based on the way he was hitting it, he had some solid hand eye and good hands.

Everything was normal until the 12th hole at Makefield, a relatively short par 5.

I was about 100 yards out. Bailey was next to me on my right. Rob had walked maybe 25 yards ahead and was about 10 yards farther right. CK4 and I were both watching Bailey hit.

He absolutely flushed one.

The only problem was it wasn’t headed toward the green.

This thing was a missile headed directly at Rob. A low lined toe ball.

None of us could yell, “FORE!” because he wasn’t that far away.

Rob never reacted.

Remember, this is the guy who just told us he doesn’t see very well.

From where I was standing, I was convinced he was about to take one square in the dick. The ball was a low screamer and had to be moving 75 mph and there wasn’t enough time for him to do anything about it.

It caught him flush in the thigh.

The difference between a funny story and a trip to the emergency room was maybe six inches.

It missed his phone by about three inches and missed his manhood by about the same. Honestly, I don’t think it could have hit him in a better spot if it was going to hit him at all.

He barely flinched.

The four of us just stood there trying to process what had happened.

I’ve been close before. I’ve ricocheted a ball off a tree that almost hit me. I once nearly hit Evan on a shot that had no business getting anywhere near him. I’ve even seen a guy bleeding all over the course after getting nailed with the Shee, but I never actually saw the shot.

This was different.

Golf balls don’t hit people very often, especially people in your own group. There’s a reason nobody stands in front of someone who’s swinging. I don’t care how good they are or how bad they are. Getting hit by a golf ball is one of those things that’s incredibly easy to avoid…right up until someone forgets where they’re standing.

Today was one I won’t forget.