How long would it take you to eat an iPad?

This is a question I thought of like 15 years ago. A day? A week? A year? What’s your strategy? Are you allowed to melt it down? Or blend it into a smoothie? Do you need to space out certain parts so you don’t die? There are a lot of stupid tangents you can take. 

This popped into my head in the middle of the night last night when I was holding Harrison, and now I’m writing this in the middle of the night tonight as I hold him again. 

When I think about that question now, I’m embarrassed. In the moment, as a ~20 year old, I remember thinking it was creative, out of the box, ‘no one asks things like that!!’. Like it was something I’d say in a job interview to show that I see the world wildly and in wild ways.

There’s a reason no one asks that, because it doesn’t make any sense. I just took a verb that isn’t normally associated with a noun and paired them and thought I was the man.

To be fair, I don’t think I ever actually asked anyone that. I probably blogged about it on Bansheemann7, thank god that’s not accessible. 

That popped into my head because I think about Harrison growing up, and when he’s 7, or 12, or even 20 like I was, he’s going to think of really stupid shit that he thinks is clever. And he’s going to say it to a lot of people. And he’s going to look back 10 years later and cringe at it. And that’s how life works. 

Or who knows. Maybe Steve Jobs spent a lot of time asking people how long it would take them to eat an iPad.

So long as Harrison keeps sleeping terribly (month+ now), this is the content you will get.