Pres moved to Philadelphia and is doing Pizza Reviews left and right.
Are Pizza Reviews cool? Not really. It’s cheese pizza. Three ingredients tops. How many variations can you possibly come across? “The one from Carlo’s in Trenton has the exact same crust as Jonny’s in Philly“. Riveting stuff.
But people don’t watch it for the pizza, they watch it for Pres. Seeing a hundred-millionaire interact with peasants is part of Pres’ charm.
So I’m wondering what do I do when I inevitably come across Pres doing one? I can’t explain how, but I know it’s going to happen.
First things first – the image below is from the Explorer’s Den at Lasalle which I’ve had about a dozen times thanks to Gourlay. It absolutely sucks ass. But this is the LEAST cool thing you can do. Unless you’re posting it on Instagram so the girl you’re trying to hook up with watches it and replies, it’s useless. But you need 10 seconds of footage for that and these people film his entire review.
I’m OUT on using my phone. No video. No pictures. Those are for scrubs The ONLY two people I’ve ever stopped to ask for a picture were Henry Sims and Nik Stauskus. Basketball royalty.
So if I walk by and Pres is in front a place with no one around doing his thing, what do I say?
Some people shout “PRES!“, some say “Barstool!!“, some say “Best pizza in the city!“. Those are boring. If you’re not going to be original you might as well not say anything at all.
Okay, original. Got it.
“Stortz.com!! Quality hand tools since 1853!” Original, unique, but not funny or charming.
“Covy and melon!” Certainly original, but he would have no idea what that means.
I’m not sure what hits right here. I guess if I REALLY wanted to be seen I’d kick him in the nuts then show him this blog post. He’d respect that.
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