These rankings are based off of my memory of every episode, even if I’ve only seen them once and it was years ago. This is Round 1 because I’m going to rewatch every episode after I post this and re-rank them.
Tom did this before Season 5 was released which you can see here, but it’s hard to take it seriously when you rank Metalhead #1.
Spoilers ahead.
Bottom Tier
23. Rachel, Jack and Ashley Too
It was just… bad. And I actually thought Miley was good. The crazy aunt was overdone, the coma thing was dumb, and then shit completely hit the fan when Ashley’s conscience went into Rachel’s Ashley Too. Once that happened, I lost interest. The rest felt childish and the ending was so mediocre. Maybe this is why Black Mirror sticks to pessimism.
22. Crocodile
The scenery and beauty of this episode keep it from being the bottom spot. I disliked like Mia (the main girl) more and more with every decision she made, and the story line as a whole was meh. I was happy when this one finished so I could move on.
21. Waldo Moment
It’s not crazy to think that this concept happen, but this episode is an extreme example, and when compared to other episodes, it lacks excitement and the usual thought provoking feeling you have when the episode ends.
Low Tier
20. Arkangel
Maybe I don’t like this one because I’m not a parent, but the idea was lame and the ending of her beating her mom to near-death felt added in just for shock value.
19. Bandersnatch
This may be unfair since I didn’t watch all the endings, but that was part of the problem. Once I got through this once, I had zero desire to go back. I give them credit for trying something new, and maybe some people really liked the execution, but this missed for me.
18. NoseDive
I like making fun of the attention grabbers and highlighting the shallowness of people these days, but this took it too far. This felt like a gimme for a Black Mirror and the result was about what it should’ve been.
17. The National Anthem
A departure from all the other episodes in that there’s no real superior technology to display. It’s cool being on the inside of a national crisis but the lack of creativity compared to almost every other episode, despite being interesting to watch, leaves this low.
16. Shut Up and Dance
People like this one, how far will you go to cover up your darkest secrets. The interaction between Kenny (the kid) and Hector (the guy) is fun to watch, but robbing the bank, delivering the money, fighting to the death, and the hackers revealing the video anyway felt like a step away from reality.
15. Metalhead
Sorry Tom. It was fun to watch, but there’s no real story, no real twist, just a ‘chase’, a character you’re rooting for, and a devastating ending.
Middle Tier
14. Fifteen Million Merits
A pretty basic concept of would you sacrifice your own authenticity to be successful. And it’s sweetly tied in with a love story to boot. The story is believable, and goes to say that basically yes, we all talk a big game, but if given the chance, we’d make the same choice as them.
13. Be Right Back
Not my favorite episode as far as watching along, but it left me thinking more than most. People generally cherish everything they can of the dead, but how far is too far?
12. Black Museum
An episode that’s more about the story than tugging the viewers morality. The tales that Rolo tells Nish are exciting, but when you get to the idea of executing someone over and over, even the hologram of a murderer, you start to question Rolo. The big reveal and idea of the asshole getting what he deserves in the end was satisfying.
11. PlayTest
A VR AI that learns how best to scare you would be absolutely horrifying, and they did a good job showing that in this episode, but that was secondary. Him dying instantly with all of that being in his own head and SaitoGemu just moving on as if it’s normal left me a little disappointed.
10. Striking Vipers
I read something saying Black Mirror asked, “Fellas, is it gay if…” with this episode and I loled. The ‘is it us or is it just the game‘ moment was creative and the realistic, definitive ending was oddly satisfying.
High Tier
9. Men Against Fire
The premise of tricking soldiers into killing by making the enemy seem non-human was mind blowing to me. Once Stripe realized this was happening, the human instinct sort of takes over, you don’t treat humans like this, but governments don’t care.
8. Smithereens
The episode itself wasn’t GREAT. But the ending was one of my favorites yet. I’m watching the struggle thinking “Oh no, they’re going to shoot the black guy, he can’t die here!“. Then the shot happens. And you don’t know. And you see people checking their phones then immediately returning to daily life. And the actual ending doesn’t matter. For all these real life stories, they’re just a notification on our phone, and we move on.
7. San Junipero
Consistently one of the top rated episodes but it’s not all the way there for me. The optimism of this episode is a welcome change (unlike Ashley Too), the story is well done, but despite all the #1 rankings, this just felt like a GOOD episode to me.
6. White Bear
You feel bad for the girl while she progresses through this pretty exciting landscape, then you learn her past, then you have to decide, is what she did deserving of her torture? Would it be better to just kill her? Personally I felt bad for her, but if the story was told in a different way, would I change my mind?
5. Hated in the Nation
The idea of literally killing all the internet trolls is awesome. I always wonder who the hell actually sends death threats via Twitter, but they exist. I hate bees, so this hit a little too close to home, but this was really done.
Top Tier
4. USS Callister
A universally liked episode. A great concept that is played out in a very reasonable way. You have your weird developments, you’re rooting against wanna-be Philip Seymour Hoffman, and you get the ending you’re hoping for.
3. Hang the DJ
Kind of a surprise pick for top three but this was one of my favorites. The story was compelling and the concept behind computing a match % based on how many simulations you ‘break out’ together is genius. I can only hope this happens in my lifetime so I can actually find a significant other.
2. The Entire History of You
This episode has the most creative use of futuristic technology and how it would actually impact daily life. You can imagine yourself rewatching moments over and over again, driving yourself crazy, and tearing down lives just as Liam does.
1. White Christmas
This one blew me away more than any other episode. One of the longest episodes and I was drawn in to every minute. The dynamic between all of the characters, the story telling, the major twist, the thought of ‘does a confession really count if it’s not literally you doing it, but your conscience‘? This is Black Mirror at it’s finest, and if a newbie asked me what would I recommend to get a feel for it, this would be it.
Recent Comments